There are no kings, but there are some silent dictators who try to rule us. The nation has adopted democracy, but its people have been failed to understand the democracy. The power of people is seen only during elections when people vote one leader and vote out another. These new leaders rule the people not like a leader but like a dictator, not all but most of them. I have some sympathy with politicians for their dictator like actions. They probably do it because of fierce opposition, cutthroat competition from their party and to take faster decisions because there will never be a consensus in politics.
But politicians are not the only dictators in a democratic country like India. Some small leaders rule you directly, and you don’t even realize it. As soon as you complete reading this blog, you will know most of my observations are correct. These little dictators have dominated you several times like a slave and broken your self-respect into pieces.
Start with your home, think of your father or mother, they are the leaders who run your home. Do you think they even consider your point of view? Our parents want us to follow them, listen to them without questions, without a second thought. If we don’t obey they get angry; they scold us just like a king and dictator does. Our parents prefer democracy in the nation but a dictatorship in the home.
Don’t you have a friend in your group who tries to dominate the group? I bet you do. This friend first charms the group with his initiatives to plan hangouts and his sense of humor. All friends enjoy his company and agree to his suggestions. But gradually this friend takes the whole group for granted, and he gets aggressive if you don’t like his plans and dislike the friend who disagrees with him
What about your boss or manager or team leader? Does he values your inputs or force his decisions on you? These bosses may even twist and turn the policies and processes of companies to push their independent choices. They like to enjoy the little authority over few employees; they want to be the king of few cubicles. They will take the credit if the team performs well, but if the team commits mistake they will find a scapegoat to save their face, they will not accept any responsibility. They think authority is a power and not a responsibility.
After you select a political leader in a democracy, does he behave like a democrat or like a dictator? He even takes out those from his political party who opposes his decisions. They think the ultimate power given to them is to rule and harass the people.
But at least political leaders are condemned and criticised for their kingly behaviors. But who will slam this other class of dictators like your parents, bosses, school and college principles, chairman of different private and federal institutions? They all resent dictatorship publicly, but they behave like a dictator in their small kingdoms.
Traits of a dictator:
• The decisions of dictators are non-negotiable
• They don’t give much consideration to how their decision will affect others.
• Their decision is an order; they want people to follow their orders without question.
• They will hold the grudge and punish people who don’t act exactly as per their demand.
• They try to reinforce their influence with repetitive orders and loud voice.
• They do not appreciate the praise of other leaders before them.
• They try to control the subordinates and keep implying the position at all times.
• They want people to fear them, and they get restless if anyone is better than they are.
Traits of a leader:
• The true leader takes into account the impact of his decision on others
• The explain the reasons for making decisions
• They inspire and request people to support their decisions.
• They encourage feedback about the decisions to make quick adjustments as required
• They seek other people’s trust and respect.
• They promote and learn from people who are better than they are.
You cannot handle political dictatorship directly unless you are their competition but you can manage other dictators and you should before they consider ruling you as their right.
How to deal with dictators?
• Let dictators control other people you walk away
• Do not argue with dictator but stand your ground
• Indirectly imply to them the difference between true leader and a dictator
• Use humor to manage the control freak
• Pretend to be an aggressive man whenever possible; the dictator will take you seriously.
– Amit Kalantri (Writer, Magician, Mentalist)